Who Are You Trying to Fool?

I am often amazed to what lengths men will go to convince themselves that their actions and/or decisions they make are righteous, justifiable, or both.  We are masters of shifting blame, misdirection, and rationalization.  Not unlike statistics to a mathematician, we can compile and select all the "facts", scriptures, case studies, and scenarios necessary to make the "numbers" add up to what we want them to say.  Then we rehearse our story to the point that we convince ourselves that we are righteous and just.  Once that is done, we can then, with impunity and conviction, set out to convince others just how "right" we are.  It's a marvel to watch from any seat in the house.  The most adept of us have learned that if we can first convince or sell our inner circles of our righteousness, then these unquestioning disciples can then cheer us on and help further the flawed logic.

If there is a spectrum for measuring theological knowledge and on one end is a Theologian and on the other there is a noob.  Well, I am a noob.  Sometimes it's good to be a noob; to see things with new clear eyes.  In my very limited and often one-sided understanding of the stories I read in my Bible, I have developed a couple favorites that contain some very real and useful lessons.  In my first attempts to read the bible, I had no idea where to start or how to study what I was reading, so a great and wise and snarky friend told me to start by reading The Book of John.  So I did...in one day...and I eagerly asked, "Okay, what do I read next?"  She said, "Read it again."  Huh?  I just read it, is it going to change?  What I didn't understand then was that the more I read it, the more I "saw".

In John 8:1-11, you'll find one of my favorite stories.  The religious teachers of the day brought before Jesus a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery.  The Law dictated that this women be stoned, so the religious teachers wanted to see if Jesus would follow the Law or disobey the Law.  There is this group of men, stones in hand, surrounding this sinner, this adulterous woman wanting Jesus to confirm what they already knew in their minds was righteous and just.  There was no doubt in these mens' minds; none.  In their minds, there must have only been two possible outcomes; either Jesus would agree and take up a stone himself or he would defy the Law in front of all of these religious men and scholars.  If Jesus disobeyed the Law, then how easy it would be for these religious scholars to discredit Him publicly?  But what Jesus said was "The sinless one among you, go first: Throw the stone." (John 8:8, MSG).  One after the other, these religious men dropped their stones and walked away starting with oldest among them.  Jesus continued by telling the woman to go and sin no more.

Great story and one I usually think of when I see Christian leaders on TV speaking out against gay marriage or preachers speaking about moral failures.  I simply would ask them if instead of an adulterous woman encircled by religious scholars toting stones there was a homosexual man or another sinner, would Jesus then have thrown the stone.  The answer is simple: No, the story would not change.  I'm sure people with much more knowledge and experience than myself might refute my assertion and overload me with evidence to the contrary, but that's not the point of this blog post.  The part of the story I want to focus on is the mob of Pharisees, these religious scholars, modern day preachers, pastors, priests, etc.

What we know is this mob of Pharisees shows up at Mount Olive with this woman.  But how did this start?  Who was the leader, the organizer, and the person who took The Law and manipulated into this test in which to try and entrap Jesus in breaking the Law?  We know they dropped their stones one by one and walked away starting with the oldest, so it's safe to say these older more influential men were the ring leaders.  They weren't wrong in their understanding of the Law.  They were wrong in the purpose they created and manipulated the use of the Law to entrap Jesus.  That is the wickedness of man.  The elder convinced himself that the plan to entrap Jesus was just and righteous.  He used the Law to convince his brethren that he was "right" and used his influence he had over them to create this righteous rock-toting mob of respected men.  They all had stones, they all were convinced they were righteous.  They were adept at convincing themselves and convincing their peers that their wickedness was justified, rational, noble, and even Godly.  They adulterous woman was the misdirection.  Focus your eyes upon this sinner so their own wickedness would be concealed.  But they could not fool Jesus.  They could not misdirect His eyes, or conceal their wickedness from Him.

No matter how many times I read that chapter, I think about men I know, myself, people I love and respect and how we are more like those Pharisees.  When the Pharisees disbanded, the Bible doesn't tell us they recognized the evil in their ways or the wickedness in their actions.  These men, more than likely, still felt they were following the Law.  They dropped their stones and walked away not having been enlightened, but because light was cast upon the evilness in them.  In their hearts they had convinced themselves they were just because it says right there in the Law that an adulterer is to be stoned.  The manipulation of the Law for the purpose of trying to bring destruction to another human being is evilness.  Trying to bring destruction to others under the guise of righteousness is the wickedness of man, especially those who use their influence to cause others to go along with them.

We all have done things and convinced ourselves we were righteous and just.  Today, this week, last month, we've all been in the position where we've got to convince ourselves things we know in our hearts are wrong are justified.  We saw, "Look at what you've done" or "Look at what you haven't done" to take eyes off of us.  We say things like, "She doesn't love me enough", "My boss doesn't understand", or "If it wasn't for so-so, I wouldn't be doing this."  My personal favorite I hear men say is, "You brought this on yourself."  Classic shifting of blame/misdirection.  But you can't fool everyone; you can't fool Jesus.  Sometimes you have to look down at your hand and visualize you're holding that stone.  You have to have the guts to drop that stone on your own accord.  As a leader or a follower, you have to know that you're holding that stone and that you made the decision to pick it up on your own.  Whether you broke a promise, lied, cheated, betrayed someone, or conspired against someone is one thing, but to try and fool yourself or others into thinking you're righteous is truly a sign of a wicked person.  Who do really think you're fooling anyway?

Chocolate Cake

I've always thought that at some point in my life I would have figured things out and perfected my personality and character to be the type of man I have always strove to be.  That it wouldn't be a lifelong journey of  corrective measures to stay on a path to a destination that always proves to be over the next hill.  When seasons of great personal growth aren't followed by a digression back into old habits, old failures, and old ways of thinking.

For months now, I've been spinning out of control back into my self-centered arrogant ways.  It's been a slow digression, but an obvious one.  For me, it's akin to a fat kid knowing he shouldn't eat all of the chocolate cake but he does anyway because he lacks the self discipline to not eat it.  It would be one thing to not be aware of his behavior and its repercussions on his waistline and another to be fully aware of the consequences of his decisions and to continue the behavior will hating the resultant.  That's me, I'm the fat kid, both literally and figuratively.  I know when I'm being arrogant or acting in a manner that is egocentric, but like the fat kid, I can't stop shoveling in the chocolate cake.

It's unattractive and it undermines my influence, which effects my ability to be an effective leader at work, at home, and in the community.  It affects my relationships in a negative manner, makes work harder at times, and makes people who don't know me not want to invest in getting to know me.  The people who love you will continue to love you, but I'm probably not getting everything I could out of those relationships.  It is the rock that has caused all the ripples in my pond and yet I keep throwing it in.

The good news is I have a great emotional awareness of it and wonderful role models and men whom I respect and strive to emulate who surround me almost daily.  Men both younger and older that have figured this out already.  Men who may have other shortcomings other than an insatiable fondness for chocolate cake, but whose hearts are rooted in humility, Godliness, and righteousness.  Men whose view of money, success, and the trappings of the world are from a perspective of something other than their own self gratification.

It's a not a self deprecating ideal either.  There are many great things about me, but the first part of pushing away from the chocolate cake has to be the realization that there is chocolate all over my face and it needs to be wiped clean.  So, if you want to help and you see or hear me being arrogant or egocentric, just say, "Hey, you got a little something right there on your face, it looks like chocolate cake."